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Object Constancy

by Edna Wallace, LMFT

Tell me…
What is it like 
to be totally consumed,
blazing, longing. 

What is that fire
scorching your skin,
where every part of 
you aches for the other? 

You want that object,
you want so badly. 

If you could, 
you’d swallow
every bit of his
gorgeousness
so that he’d live 
inside. 
So that you’d have 
him for good. 

But you can’t. 

All you can do 
is live 
in your skin, 
waiting,
coming together,
separating.

And then again…
Waiting. 
Alone. 

Waiting for the 
absent texts,
for a surprise call,
an emoji heart. 

You sit in 
that painful
emptiness. 

You’ve set yourself
up for the perpetual
cycle, 
the nightmare of 
not knowing,
not hearing,
not having. 

Sitting in
your pool of 
wanting…
until you 
hear from him 
again.