back to summer 2026 newsletter

You bet it is. 
You know it is. 
You nicked it from my pocket,
you nasty thief you. 
I was with my friend,
enjoying a “spa day”, 
and you jostle me
and lift my phone. 
I’m standing there
searching for my phone;
it isn’t in my coat,
it isn’t in my purse, 
and this nice bloke 
comes up and says,
“Are you missing 
your phone?”
Yes, I seem to be. 
“I saw who took it.”
What?
“I saw her nick it. 
She’s close by.”
He looks at me,
then across the street.
“Let’s go get it!”
Amazing. 
We run over. 
He points to you. 
You took my phone. 
I say, my arms crossed.
“I don’t know what 
you’re talking about.”
You have my phone!
The bloke says,
“It’s her. She’s the one.
I saw her do it.”
Then you reach into
your pocket and 
take out my phone. 
You say,
“Is this yours?”
You bet it is. 
I hug my new friend …
and you run.
Go ahead run,
you coward.
I got my phone. 
Thank you, mate!